The Hardest Part Thus Far.
The Best Views Come After the Hardest Climb...
I have been told that the hardest part about joining the Peace Corps is getting medically cleared. And if you ask me, it has been so far. I have had to go in and out of doctor's appointments and dentists appointments. I have had to get lab work done, lots of lab work. So much lab work that when I went into the lab to get it all done the guy looked at all my slips and said, "Oh my gosh what do they think is wrong with you?" And I just said, "I'm joining the Peace Corps, and they need to ensure I am healthy." He didn't have anything else to say after that. I also had to get some shots. Which was a huge ordeal because I am up to date on all my shots but the Peace Corps needed a few more and basically Kaiser didn't wanna give them to me when I made my appointment so I had to go somewhere else. Now after getting all of this done I STILL HAD MORE TO DO! It honestly became this endless circle of turning things in and them telling me I still needed more. So with my level of anxiety and the constant back and forth my stress level was through the roof and all I had to do was really getting to me. I was so stressed and I was starting to doubt if the Peace Corps was really where I was supposed to be. Of course like always I was letting my fear and anxiety get the best of me. I probably went home and cried several times from all the endless stress. Which is no surprise to most because I cry all of the time. I honestly don't even need to be sad, I cry when I am happy also. Praise the Lord I have amazing friends that constantly speak truth into my life and remind me that God has called this into my life. Now despite my fear and anxiety that seems to always be there God continues to remind me that this is his plan.
"Of course like always I was letting my fear and anxiety get the best of me."So the medical clearance didn't get any easier but instead much much harder. However, I actually learned a lot. I learned that all I need to do is trust Jesus, trust that his timing is always perfect and all I have to do is be patient and all things will work out. So on August 9th I finally got my medical clearance, and boy did I scream! I could not contain my excitement over the medical clearance. The hardest part about my journey is over! Since then I have submitted my visa application and finished all my other tasks. So now I wait to hear back from the Ugandan Embassy and pray for a visa. The one part of this journey I am not actually nervous about. So now I am just anxiously awaiting the email with the number for me to call in order to buy my plane ticket for my staging event. Right now I am in a time of waiting, waiting for my next step, waiting for this journey to officially begin. Now I am spending time with the Lord asking Him to prepare my heart for this amazing journey that is coming my way. I honestly can't think about anything else but this journey.
"I actually learned a lot. I learned that all I need to do is trust Jesus, trust that his timing is always perfect and all I have to do is be patient and all things will work out."Recently, I have been scrolling through Facebook at all sort of Peace Corps pictures desiring nothing more than being in Uganda teaching and learning more about the beautiful culture of Uganda. I love dreaming about what my life is going to be like when I move to Uganda but I also need to remember to focus on the here and now. I need to enjoy the time I have left here with the friends here that I am going to miss terribly. The bible says, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about it's self. Each day has enough trouble for itself." -Matthew 6:34 This honestly is so hard for me. I look to the future more than I should. So for the next two months this is what I am going to be working on. Being present and not focusing on the future and all it may hold. So while I learn to fly with brave wings I will also learn to focus on only today, which I believe will help me stay brave.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about it's self. Each day has enough trouble for itself." -Matthew 6:34So, if you are anything like me and you freak out in the midst of stress, I promise you are not alone. My encouragement for you is to seek friends who can speak truth into your life that will calm your spirit, and pray that God will give you a calm spirit as well. If you are also similar to me and focus to much on the future stop, live for today tomorrow will come and you can focus on it when it actually comes. I also can promise you that it helps with your stress and anxiety. When you aren't focusing on tomorrow you can worry about it.
Goodbye for now,