It's Okay to be Scared.
"It takes courage to let go of the familiar and embrace the new."
My blogging is all about being real and being open about my life. Something that is a huge struggle of mine is keeping my room, bathroom, and car clean. Quite frankly I am a mess and I am trying to work on it. So today as I was cleaning my room, I started going through all the things in my room getting rid of the things I no longer need and preparing to purge for Uganda. I immediately got emotional. So as I was sitting on my floor thinking about all the change that is coming in the next month and a half, I began to cry.
"Quite frankly I'm a mess."I don't even completely know why I was crying. I guess because in fifty one days I am moving across the world away from my friends and family, away from everything I know, and away from my community and support system. I guess that is means enough to begin crying. I began to remind myself of all the reasons why I am doing this. I am moving because Jesus has called me into this job and has guided me into this next season of my life. He has given me this heart for Uganda and He has allowed for me to go and move there. I had to remind myself of these things because I was beginning to panic and get scared. It's hard when these fears creep in because i know God has called me into this life, into this path, and He has put me on this journey to go to Uganda and be His hands and feet. Fear can be so loud screaming at me telling me that this isn't the right plan for my life and I'm not qualified for these next steps. But what gets me past the fear is know that God is behind me through the entire thing. He is far bigger than all of my fear and he is whispering to me that He loves me, and He is providing for me.
"It's hard when these fears creep in because i know God has called me into this life, into this path, and He has put me on this journey to go to Uganda and be His hands and feet."So as I cleaned my messy room I reflected on these past few months. All the things I had to do to prepare for the Peace Corps. All the times I cried from stress but rejoiced because of the adventure I am on. All the times I thanked God for His blessings in all of this, but also all the times I asked Him if He was sure this was right for me. I also began to dream about whats to come, because honestly this is all a dream come true and I am so thankful to be chasing after this God given dream. All of this may be very scary for me but it's so exciting it's a five year dream in the making and I can't wait to see what Jesus does in this journey of my life.
"I also began to dream about whats to come, because honestly this is all a dream come true and I am so thankful to be chasing after this God given dream."
So with all of my reflecting today, I want to challenge all of you to reflect on where God has you. I dare you to dream, dream so big that you begin to fear, because I know that it's in those moments where you will begin to trust the Lord more. Ask God to bring change in your life, change that is far more beautiful than you could ever imagine. I'm learning how to be brave so I am taking courage and embracing this new journey and letting the Lord lead me in every direction.
Goodbye for now,